Tuesday, September 11, 2007


Today is D-day! I went for a walk at 6:30 and watched a city worker lower the flag to half-mast...he nodded and smiled at me while I walked by...I smiled back and looked up...poignant moment...if Bean were born today...flags would always be at half-mast on his birthday...yesterday I met a woman at the postoffice whose birthday is today...I told her I would take it as a hopeful omen...she said she had always loved her birthday because the season is so beautiful and that in the past six years, she's made due by making it a day that signifies humankinds' preserverance in the face of adversity...I liked that.

I still feel like an overdue library book though...just sitting around collecting late fees...

And if you know me, you know that I abhore things overdue or late...until I met Jacob I never had a late fee on a library item (he is a bad influence on me in that regard), and I've always been obsessive about paying bills on time...another lesson I'm selected to learn here, I guess. I'm not in control and I have to draw on God's grace to turn my anxiety and impatience into something more constructive with these precious last days (or weeks?)...

So yesterday, I went and picked 5 lbs of raspberries at my new favorite place in Brevard, the Queen's Berry & Produce Farm, a 12-acre plot of homegrown, organic goodness that is run by sweet Mr. Queens, who wears old denim overalls and a John Deere baseball hat and looks about as authentic as one can. (I took all these beautiful pictures of my harvest and him, but I accidentially erased them this morning while wrestling with my computer...so you just have to use your imagination...)

He offered me a ride on the tractor, if the picking "don't move things right quick" he is a funny old man. I might go back and pick more just because the 2 hours I spent in the aromatic and tranquil berry hedges were so inspiring and lovely. I started to imagine a children's book based on this experience...along the lines of all the lesson one can learn while picking sweet berries...

So now we're really just waiting. Jacob's resorting to putting his hand on my belly and "commanding" Bean to be born...he is ready, it's very apparent now...and so am I.

Baby c'mon!

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